Adina Roth – Head of Jewish Life

This past weekend, we experienced a historical moment, that we will all remember for years to come, when the hostages started to come back to Israel from the Gaza strip in a prisoner exchange. Rabbi Donniel Hartman commented that the Jewish people’s agonising, rallies, prayers and activism about the hostages is testament to our great love for each other and the great pain we have all felt. This is why, as relieved as the abductees are to be back with their loved ones, they keep repeating the same refrain, “we can’t be fully happy until everyone is home”.

In this week’s Parsha, Vayishlach, we find a famous long awaited meeting, where the two brothers, Eisav and Yaakov, are reunited after many years. After stealing the blessing from his Eisav, Yaakov ran away from his very angry brother. Eventually, 28 years later, it is time to return to the land of Canaan, but to achieve this, Yaakov has to reconcile with his brother. Before they meet, Yaakov is scared for his life. He sends his brothers gifts of appeasement, he prays to God and he has a mysterious struggle with an angel all night long. Eventually, the next day, they meet up. Yaakov is so nervous of Eisav, that he bows seven times before him, and then we are witness to a famous kiss, Vayeshikeihu, and Eisav kissed him.

This is the most famous kiss in the Torah – so famous that in the actual Torah itself, it has little dots on top of the word, as if an ancient scribe is saying “notice me”. There is a debate in the Midrash between Rabbis Shimon and Yannai about what these curious dots may mean. Rabbi Shimon says the dots indicate that Eisav was ready to make up with his brother and that he came with his whole heart to this moment. Rabbi Yannai says the opposite – Eisav was still mad, and he pretended as if he was going to embrace his brother but he came with bad intentions. The dots were an indication that he tried to bite his brother!!

I have never liked the bite theory. I want to believe that after 28 years Yaakov and Eisav are really able to grow up and make nice. But when I think about what the Jewish world is going through at the moment, I understand this strange kiss with the dots. To me, it’s the moment of relief that still has some pain attached. It’s the moment that you are so grateful that some people are coming home, while you are hurting because others are not. This past week, I attended a Jewish community singing experience called Kooloolam, where people got together to sing for the hostages. 400 people stood together and sang a song called Coming Home. I pray it will get to the point as the Jewish people, where we can enjoy the embrace of all the people coming home without the bite, without hanging by a thread each day to hear more good news.

I know for me, this experience of ‘a kiss with a bite’ feels all too real as we end the school year. On a personal note, this marks the end of our first year in Sydney and at Emanuel. While it has not been easy to leave our lives and loved ones behind, the end of a year marks a sweet time to look around at the beautiful people we have met here, the Emanuel School community of staff, teachers and families who have welcomed us. It has brought us sweetness and comfort to think we have come to this good place. Yet even now as we begin a long-awaited holiday in our new home, this December, part of us will be thinking about the situation in Israel and praying for the return of all loved ones to their families and for peace. For many of us, this December will be somewhat fraught and not an all-out celebration. But this is surely the meaning of being human; to hold the joy of summer, of family and friendship, relaxation, ocean and gelato alongside the brokenness of our fractured world. There is still much work to be done, but for now, I wish us all a good rest.

I want to thank all of you for reading my Ma Nishma articles. I love interacting with you.

Shabbat Shalom, Nesiah Tovah to those who are traveling, L’chu B’shalom U’bo’u B’shalom, Go in peace and come in peace.