Gabriela Amoils – Year 12 2019

In this week’s parashah, God tells Ya’akov to return home. Worried that his brother Eisav will kill him, Ya’akov divides his clan into two camps, to ensure some will survive in case of a fight.

Ya’akov sleeps alone in the desert and is encountered by a stranger with whom he wrestles until the morning. With a dislocated hip but still alive, Ya’akov gets renamed Yisra’el by the stranger, meaning one who wrestles with God. Ya’a’kov meets his brother and, surprisingly, they kiss and embrace.

After years of heated disagreement Ya’akov and Eisav are reconciled. Their relationship is somewhat awkward, and they will never be the closest of brothers. Still, for the first time each can accept the other as he is; each can see the other’s wealth without wanting it.

What has changed? How can two people, after one deceived the other and the other threatened to kill him, now embrace?

During their childhood, Eisav and Ya’akov were in fierce competition. Each was beloved by one parent, but felt the other was the favoured child. Each wanted what the other had. Nothing was worthwhile wanting, unless it belonged to the other.

It feels as if they are never happy with what they have, and are always in need of more, to spite the other. They are children competing for their parents’ attention and gifts. Each is too needy to acknowledge the other’s needs.

When they reunite, Eisav and Ya’akov have overcome their neediness. Each has a family, retainers and possessions acquired through his own efforts. Ya’akov, who has always gained at Eisav’s expense, offers him a gift. Eisav refuses, saying, “I have enough, my brother; let what you have remain yours”. Ya’akov insists, claiming, “God has favoured me and I have plenty”

Each of the brothers is now able to recognise how much he has; secure in themselves, they have no need to envy each other.

Each and every one one of us is constantly striving to achieve some goal. Absorbed in our efforts, we sometimes lose sight of how much we already have, and focus on what others have. We envy the achievements of others rather than appreciate our own. Only when we learn to value what we are and what we have, can we live at ease with others. 

This is a big issue in our lives. We should all take time in our lives to focus on what we have and achieved, and not the achievements and possessions of others. For example, When getting an exam back, you shouldn’t be comparing marks and seeing whom you did better than or who did better than you, you should just focus on your own marks and your personal happiness.

This biblical story teaches us a valuable lesson about jealousy. In the end, jealousy will only be detrimental to oneself, until that jealousy can be replaced with inner satisfaction.